Out of My Dreams
by Wilusa
Summary: Reva begins a new chapter of her life...which almost immediately takes a turn she didn't expect. I'm not labeling this AU, because I've tried not to contradict anything we actually saw in the finale except the words 'The End.'
1. A Dream Dispelled

DISCLAIMER: Guiding Light and its characters are the property of Procter & Gamble; no copyright infringement is intended.

x

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There was something different about this day.

Reva O'Neill sensed it the moment she woke.

To begin with, she was sure something had wakened her. Some sound, some movement? But the baby wasn't crying...

She rolled over, forced sleepy eyes to focus on her bedside table - and sat up with a gasp.

The only thing that should have been on that table was a clock radio. But next to it stood a framed photo of Jeffrey - the one she'd been keeping on the mantel, the only one she hadn't put away. And next to that was a small box, wrapped in silver foil and decorated with red, white, and blue ribbons.

While the objects themselves didn't seem alarming, her immediate reaction was terror. _Someone's been in the house!_

She leapt out of bed and rushed to check on baby Colin. When she found him sleeping like an angel, she made a quick check of every room. No one was there, and nothing else was out of place. Front and back doors were locked. At last she came back and sat, shakily, on the bed.

_Shayne and Jonathan have keys_...

But she couldn't imagine either of them coming in while she was asleep and making these small changes. If it had only been the photo, she might have convinced herself she _had_ put it on the table last night. But the little box, wrapped like a gift? She was sure she'd never seen it before.

With trembling fingers, she tore off the ribbons and foil. The size of the box suggested that it might contain a piece of jewelry. But even a miniature bomb wouldn't have surprised her.

She _was_, however, surprised when she lifted the lid, and discovered it was a box of -

_**Nails?**_

Dumbfounded, she belatedly saw there was a folded note. She picked it up, unfolded it - and almost dropped it, in her shock on seeing the handwriting.

_I told you I was going to the hardware store for nails, remember? For putting up our Fourth of July decorations. Sorry it's taken so long!_

_J_.

She was too stunned to move or make a sound. She just sat there, stupefied...till a soft knock came at the front door.

_He's alive!_ she realized. _It was all a terrible mistake. He's back! He did this to break it to me gently, and now he's right outside the door!_

She lurched to her feet, intending to race to the door...

And with that jolting motion, she _really_ woke up.

x

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Somehow, she remembered the baby in time to suppress what would have been a scream.

_Ohhh. Ohhh!_

_Oh my God. It was just a dream_...

Sitting up in bed, she didn't even try to control her trembling, or stem the flow of tears.

She'd had dreams about Jeffrey before, of course. Often. Some of them embarrassingly erotic.

But none had been as vivid, as cruelly _real_, as this.

Whenever she woke from a dream about him, a song-fragment came into her mind. Rodgers and Hammerstein, she thought - though she couldn't place the musical, or remember more than the one phrase.

_"Out of my dreams and into your arms I long to fly..."_

Yes, that was still true. As true as ever, or she wouldn't have been so shaken by the dream.

x

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But...there really _was_ something different about this day, she realized.

It was the day on which Josh had said he'd come back to Springfield. One year since he'd left. If he was true to his word, he'd be at the lighthouse at noon, hoping to take her and Colin away with him. Away somewhere - he hadn't even told her where. Maybe Tulsa, maybe not.

She still wasn't sure whether she'd go.

She hadn't heard from him - not a call or a note, all year. She knew he was keeping in touch with Billy and Shayne, but neither of them told her much. At times she'd thought there was a conspiracy of silence; at other times she'd convinced herself she was imagining it. _Maybe they've been waiting for me to ask about him?_

Now she was in the awkward position of not knowing who in Springfield - if anyone, other than herself - understood the significance of this day.

She knew Josh had told Billy about his plan. And in her first need to confide in someone, she'd picked, of all people, Olivia. But later, she'd asked Olivia to keep it secret, except from Natalia - who'd been so near them when they were talking that she'd probably heard it, anyway.

Billy. Vanessa, with whom he shared everything. Olivia and Natalia. They wouldn't have forgotten the plan itself. But if no one else had mentioned it to them all year (she certainly hadn't), they might have forgotten the date.

Were they the only ones who'd ever known? Or had Billy - or Josh himself - told Shayne, and others? Was it possible that all her friends and acquaintances knew about the decision she'd have to make this morning? She imagined them making gossipy phone calls. Even placing bets!

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She got out of bed, kissed Colin - without waking him yet - and began her normal morning routine. The things that would have to be done whether or not, an hour from now, she'd be packing their bags.

As she made up her bed, showered, and had a quick breakfast, she tried to organize her thoughts and reach a decision.

_I've been Jeffrey O'Neill's widow longer than I was his wife..._

On one point, she was sure.

_I'll never take a_ _**new**_ _lover_.

For her, that would be an inexcusable betrayal of Jeffrey. There were only two alternatives: to live out her life as the chaste widow of the man she still adored, or to reunite with the one who'd been a part of that life all along. Jeffrey had at least known about Josh - known she felt something for Josh, that didn't lessen her love for him.

_Was it wrong of me not to confide in Shayne and Jonathan? If they know about today, are they feeling hurt because I didn't ask their advice?_

But if she'd consulted them, she would have had to consult Marah and Dylan as well. Too much discussion might have driven her half-crazy - and set her children feuding among themselves.

She feared that no matter how many of them she'd consulted, Jonathan would have been a lone voice urging her not to go.

She'd never been able to forget Shayne's telling her he couldn't bond with her as Jonathan had. _It's a miracle even one of them could. I deserted them both, however unintentionally_. Shayne might seem close to her now, but he had to know she was to blame for his father's absence. He probably wished she'd been the one to leave. Probably cared less about his parents being reunited than about getting Josh to move back to Springfield. _But with that not an option, he'll be rooting for his father's happiness_.

Marah would be pulling for Josh too - as would Dylan, his nephew. Neither of them lived in Springfield, anyway.

But Jonathan had no reason to care about Josh, one way or the other. He had every reason to want his mother - Sarah's grandmother - to stay where she was.

And she worried about Jonathan. He'd seemed anxious, stressed-out, for the last few months. _I probably made a mistake when I encouraged him to live in the home he would have shared with Tammy. His memories are too painful_.

Still, she was leaning toward going. That might even be best for Jonathan, in the long run. Perhaps he was reluctant to leave "his and Tammy's" house for fear of hurting _her_ feelings. If she herself begged him to move into a newly-vacated Cross Creek, pretending she couldn't bear the thought of its being unoccupied, he'd have the perfect excuse.

But...

_Do I have the right to do this to Colin?_

She'd be taking him away from everyone and everything he knew. To go off with a man who, after a year's absence, would be a stranger to him...and yet would threaten, at some point, to usurp the place in his heart that should belong to the father who'd loved him so much.

Josh was no kin to Colin. Shayne and Jonathan and their children were his kin.

Like it or not, she herself was old enough to be Colin's grandmother. Or even his great-grandmother - she had a granddaughter in college! She'd hoped that to make his life a little more normal, he could grow up near, and emotionally close to, his younger relatives. In particular, she'd hoped he and Henry would become almost like brothers.

On the other hand...

_Do I have the right __**not**__ to do this __**for**__ Colin?_

How important was it that a boy have a father figure in his life? Much as she wished it otherwise, Colin's father was dead, and he wouldn't remember him. His adult half-brothers had children of their own. Realistically, the only man who could serve as a full-time father figure for Colin, and was presumably willing to do so, was Josh. Did she have the right to deny Colin that, because of her attachment to Jeffrey's memory?

Time and again, she kept coming back to the thought _I've been Jeffrey O'Neill's widow longer than I was his wife_.

There was another person she had to consider, though she hated forming his name even in her mind.

The man who'd made her a widow. _Edmund_.

In all the months Josh had been gone, no one she knew had mentioned Edmund Winslow. It was as if they'd forgotten him completely.

She never could.

She hated the thought of Edmund gloating somewhere, congratulating himself on all he'd accomplished. But his satisfaction with what he'd done might be the only thing keeping his enemies safe.

By bringing Jeffrey's plane down and killing him, he'd dealt crushing blows to her and baby Colin. He'd also managed - however indirectly - to ruin Shayne's chance for happiness with Dinah, and Marina's with Mallet. _He probably thinks that marriage broke up because Marina couldn't forgive Mallet for having suspected her of killing "John Doe."_

Edmund almost certainly didn't know Shayne and Marina had, discreetly, become a couple.

_If I go away with Josh, will he find out about it, and go on a kidnapping or killing spree because he thinks I'm happy again?_

_Even if I'm not all that "happy"?_

_No_, she told herself, _I'm being paranoid_.

Her departure with Josh - if she went - would be so low-key that even if Edmund learned she'd left Springfield, he wouldn't know she'd gone with a man. Or where they'd wound up.

And he must have abandoned the idea of abducting his grandson Henry. The media had interviewed Shayne for human-interest features about his son's rare blood type - which he, fortunately, shared. Edmund had to know the child might not survive if he snatched him and tried to raise him.

With a wry smile, she thought of Phillip and Beth. They had a history with Edmund, too. But so many things had happened to the Spauldings in recent years, unrelated to him, that they'd seemingly put him out of their minds. They'd been happily married for ten months now - and evidently, there hadn't been as much as a murmur from Edmund.

_Phillip and Beth had the right idea. Edmund will only win if we let fear of him paralyze us. He probably doesn't have a real, flesh-and-blood spy within a thousand miles of here._

Finally, Josh.

She knew she could truthfully tell Josh, "I love you. I always have, and I always will." She'd done that a year ago. (Echoing words _he_ had spoken first...)

And yet she also knew that deep down, she no longer loved him in the same way he loved her.

On that day when she'd last seen him, he'd made it clear he still thought of her as the great love of his life. But to her, he'd become one of a dozen or more people she loved in various ways.

She didn't love him "like a brother." If she went with him, she'd share his bed - and enjoy it, in a comfortable-as-an-old-shoe, middle-aged way. She'd be grateful for his devotion, for his help in raising Colin; and she'd find contentment, of a sort, in giving him pleasure.

But she wasn't passionately _in_ love with him.

With Jeffrey, she'd been swept up in an unexpected love that changed everything. She'd felt young again - seen a world of new, exciting possibilities opening before them, without any need to make an artificial "fresh start" by leaving Springfield. Perhaps it had been too good to be true, too magical to be real. But the interlude with Jeffrey had been the high point of her life.

Would it be fair to Josh to begin a new relationship with him without telling him that?

Was it possible he already knew, wanted her anyway, and it was better left unsaid?

x

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_Don't get ahead of myself_, she thought wryly._ He may not even show up - may have convinced himself I never took such a harebrained idea seriously_.

She didn't think that was likely. But it was just plausible enough that it had given her an excuse not to tell Shayne or Jonathan - and to hope no one else had told them.

Josh might not show up. Or he might come, but only to tell her he'd changed his mind...had realized the plan was ridiculous, and knew she felt the same way. Perhaps he'd even tell her that by now, there was another woman in his life.

_Would I be crushed, or relieved?_

But in all probability, she knew, Josh _would_ still want what he'd wanted a year ago.

And she'd have to give him an answer.

Soon.


	2. Doubt, Distress, Decision

_**7:30 a.m.**_

Reva had never realized the knock at her door hadn't been part of her dream. It had been very real. Her sobs had drowned out the sound of a car pulling away.

The early-morning caller was not, of course, Jeffrey. It was her son Shayne.

He'd spent the night with Marina, at her place. Rising early this Saturday morning, he'd discovered they were out of milk, and headed out to buy some before breakfast.

_Or maybe, if we weren't out of milk, I would have found another excuse_, he admitted to himself as he drove on toward the supermarket.

He'd deliberately knocked very softly - hoping to get his mother's attention if she was already up, but not to wake her, and certainly not to wake Colin.

_Bad idea_, he told himself now._ I should stay out of it, like everyone else has. Let her make her choice without pressure from any of us._

Not that he'd intended to pressure her. What he'd wanted to tell her was that he'd behaved like an ass when he said he couldn't bond with her. He'd been weighed down by his own problems, but he shouldn't have taken it out on her. Of course he'd bonded with her! He loved her, without reservation. He'd wanted to beg her forgiveness.

_But I waited too long_, he thought sorrowfully. _Today isn't the time for it._

He didn't have a firm opinion as to whether she should go with Josh. He couldn't think clearly about any of this, because he was so distracted by worry about Edmund.

Shayne never spoke of Edmund to anyone but his father and Marina. But their old enemy was always in his thoughts.

He'd gone out of his way to publicize Henry's having a rare blood type, and his being a match, so Edmund would hear about it. _He won't try again to kidnap Henry. Unless he means to snatch me too, and keep me in a cage!_ That wasn't likely. And Edmund wouldn't risk killing him, either. But what might he do to others, out of spite?

Shayne's relationship with Marina wasn't discreet by choice. They'd shared a past, before they found other loves; they'd actually lost their virginity to each other. Shayne guessed it was Mallet's knowledge of their history that had convinced him it wouldn't work for Henry to have "two daddies." And while Shayne couldn't help having some guilt feelings, Mallet had been right. By now, both his annulment and Marina's divorce were final, and they wanted to live together openly - to marry.

But he couldn't consider it, not while Edmund was alive and free. He'd be making the woman he loved a target for a madman.

During the last year, both Shayne and Josh had considered taking up the mission that had claimed Jeffrey's life. Hunting Edmund down, and either making a citizen's arrest or killing him.

This wasn't a fugitive hunt that could be left to the professionals, aided by _America's Most Wanted_. No law enforcement agencies outside Springfield were willing to be on the lookout for Edmund Winslow. His victims knew he was alive, knew it was a lookalike who'd been murdered; but they had no proof.

Still, it was quixotic to think either of the Lewis men could succeed where Jeffrey had failed. Neither one had the skills, the covert-ops experience, that he'd possessed. In the end, each of them had talked the other out of it.

Shayne had only given in when Josh pounded home his strongest argument: that Henry might need his blood, at any time.

He was sure his father - no more experienced than he, and middle-aged to boot - wouldn't stand a chance against Edmund. He'd told him that - and argued that he, Josh, was the only person who could, at some point, become the surrogate father little Colin would need. Josh had yielded...but Shayne had never felt confident that he wouldn't reverse course.

_If Mom goes with him, she'll keep him from taking off in pursuit of Edmund._

_Or will she? She couldn't stop Jeffrey._

_And Dad might never do that anyway. Realistically, he has to know he'd only get himself killed._

He knew Josh's reason for wanting to take Reva away was that Edmund might target them if they stayed in Springfield, and he learned they'd reconciled.

_But selfishly, I want at least one of my parents here. And despite what I told Dad, I want Colin here, for Henry! That isn't selfish...is it?_

No, Shayne couldn't have given his mother any advice.

He could only, silently, curse himself. For having been fool enough to let Edmund know he'd been responsible for Lara's death.

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_**9:30 a.m**_.

Jonathan Randall tried to smile as his daughter wolfed down her breakfast. He hoped the smile didn't look like a grimace.

Sarah had talked him into agreeing to take her to the park. Which was probably as good a place as any to spend the day - all his friends and relatives had been hanging out there recently, on pleasant Saturdays.

_But the relatives will be talking about Mom. Guessing what she'll do. Will they see that I'm more jumpy than anyone else?_

He'd debated calling Reva. But what on earth could he say? He didn't know what advice to give her.

Jonathan had been a wreck for the last six months. The reason? His cell phone provider had been bought out by a competitor, and in the reorganization that followed, he'd been forced to accept a new phone number. On two weeks' notice! And the provider had told subscribers that with so many numbers being changed at one time, it couldn't implement a system for directing callers to the new numbers. Jonathan - whose cell phone was his _only_ phone - had fought the change tooth and claw, to no avail.

And of course, Murphy's Law had kicked in. Jeffrey, who'd been calling him almost every day, had been silent for the entire two weeks. _That was scary in itself, but he may just have been in an out-of-the-way place where a cell phone wouldn't work._

After the phone number switch, Jeffrey - assuming he was still alive - had been unable to reach Jonathan. And Jonathan had no way to contact him. Jeffrey had been making all the calls, on prepaid phones that he quickly disposed of.

So now, if Jonathan were to take the huge risk of telling his mother the truth, that truth could only be that her husband had been alive six months ago. _God knows what Edmund may have done to him since. And if Jeffrey __**is**__ alive, he must be tearing his hair out, wondering what's happened to me!_

Jeffrey, if he was still out there, knew nothing of Josh's plan for Reva. When Jonathan first learned about it, he'd hoped Jeffrey would make it home in way less than a year. He'd decided Jeffrey was better off, in any case, not thinking he faced a "deadline": that might have driven him to take some ill-advised risk, and get himself killed. So all he'd told him was that Josh was temporarily away, supervising a major construction project in Tulsa.

If they'd been in touch within the last few weeks - the "deadline" that imminent - he definitely would have told Jeffrey what was going on, and let him make the fateful decision on what to tell, or not tell, Reva. But now it was all on Jonathan.

Nothing out of the ordinary had happened in Springfield in recent months; he wanted to believe that was a good sign. A sign that Jeffrey and Edmund were still caught up in hunting each other, leaving Edmund no time to wreak further havoc.

But still, the man's threats had been so dire that he couldn't ignore them. He had to act on the assumption that Edmund really did have spies everywhere - and if those spies even suspected Reva had learned Jeffrey was or might be alive, they or other agents would try to kill Henry, Colin, and Jonathan's own daughter, Sarah.

_I'm sure Mom's never guessed Edmund would hatch a plot __**that**__ dark. Or Shayne, either._

Jeffrey had theorized that Edmund had changed his plan from abducting and raising the three children to killing them - for spite - when he learned about Henry's blood disorder. Learned that the one child he really _wanted_ to raise might not survive if he was separated from his father. _And Shayne probably let him know about it deliberately, thinking he was __**protecting**__ Henry!_

Jonathan couldn't see any good outcome of the decision Reva had to make this day. If she left with Josh, and those all-seeing spies got word to Edmund, he might strike out in fury because she'd found happiness. No matter who with. But if she didn't go, he might jump to the conclusion that it was because Jonathan had told her Jeffrey was alive - even though he hadn't.

Sarah had finished breakfast, even washed the few dishes she'd used. Now she bounded up to him, clutching a favorite toy. "Come on, Daddy! I wanna get to the park."

_Damn, _he thought_, how I love you! It's killing me to think of a threat to you. Maybe I should warn your mother of the danger? After __**my**__ mother - does whatever she winds up doing today?_

Aloud, he said, "Yeah, you're right." He ruffled her hair. "It's a beautiful day, and time's a-wasting."

x

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_**11:30 a.m.**_

Reva looked at herself in the mirror.

_For God's sake, why did I dress like this?_

A year before, she'd come into the house after Josh left. Fighting back tears. And she'd caught a glimpse of herself in this mirror.

She'd been amazed at what she saw.

In a casual, patterned t-shirt and blue jeans, with loosely curled, windblown hair, she'd looked terrific. Teary-eyed or not, it was the best she'd looked since she learned Jeffrey was dead.

That was the image of her that Josh had taken away with him.

She'd decided to go with him today, if he still wanted her. But then she'd put on a long dress - dull, dark green - and coupled it with a severe hairstyle. Neither was becoming.

The dress was certainly low-cut. Her large peace-symbol pendant - she'd chosen that because Colin liked to play with it when she held him - rested way down in her cleavage, but was clearly visible.

_That just proves low-cut doesn't always mean sexy._

She thought she looked downright frumpy.

_Was I subconsciously trying to make Josh __**not**__ want me?_

_Or to test him, knowing I'll be able to read in his eyes whether he really wants me like this...whatever he may say?_

In any case, it was too late to change now.

_Too late to change my clothes. Not to change my mind..._

Three separate times, while she was packing, she'd caught herself humming. _"Out of my dreams and into your arms I long to fly..."_

She'd tried to convince herself that what she really wanted was to run away from her dreams of Jeffrey, with Josh.

_But that's not true. I always imagine myself running __**to**__ someone, into his arms. And then, the arms I imagine around me are Jeffrey's._

While she was vacillating, Colin toddled over and began playing with her long dress. "Mama?" He was understandably confused, having watched her hasty packing. He looked up at her, all wide-eyed innocence, and asked, "Go bye-bye?"

_How important is it that a boy have a father figure in his life? Do I have the right to deny Colin that?_

_I've been Jeffrey O'Neill's widow longer than I was his wife..._

She picked Colin up, cuddled him, and kissed him. "Yes, dear," she said firmly. "We're going bye-bye."

After she'd set him down, she locked eyes with the woman in the mirror. _You know what still has to be done. One final thing._

It wasn't easy. But with a long shudder, she did it.

Removed her wedding ring.


	3. Dreams Can Come True

_**12:30 p.m**_.

Reva found it hard to believe they were actually doing it.

But they were.

Josh had asked, "You ready?"

She'd replied with the word she knew he expected and, yes, _wanted_ to hear: "Always."

So now they were leaving Springfield, without a word of farewell to anyone - barreling along the road in a clunky truck that made her think of Ma and Pa Kettle. As she'd feared, Colin had shown no sign of recognizing Josh. But he hadn't whined when he was seated between them, in the close confines of the cab of the truck. (That wasn't ideal. But they'd agreed it would be safe because Josh planned a relaxing drive on scenic back roads, without the hazards created by speed and traffic.) And now that they were in motion, the toddler was chortling with glee.

Soon, she knew, she'd have to make some phone calls, while Josh was driving. He'd already told her Shayne, and a good many other people, had known about his plan. So they'd just have to decide in what order their loved ones should be told its outcome, to minimize hurt feelings.

That could wait for a few more minutes. They were chatting - awkwardly - about what each of them had been doing recently. _I wonder how long it'll take us to get back to where we were - to feel even as natural together as we did last year?_

She also wondered whether Josh ever thought of Edmund. _But this should be a happy day. I won't break the mood by asking._ Instead, she asked him about the newly-completed hospital wing in Tulsa. He was proud to launch into a discussion of that, and she found herself relaxing, becoming more comfortable by the moment.

They'd had this country road virtually to themselves. So when a car whizzed by, headed toward Springfield, she couldn't miss realizing that the driver was speeding. _Tempted by the open road?_ she wondered idly. _Or genuinely in a hurry to get there?_ Someone who knew the area well, and was heedless of speed limits, actually could make better time on lightly-traveled roads where no one was enforcing those limits.

Then, behind them, she heard a horrific squealing of brakes. That alone made her jump, and Colin shriek. It was followed by frantic blasts of a horn; by now, Colin was bawling in terror.

She thought for a moment that the other driver had struck something, and needed help.

But the blaring horn was coming closer...

Josh looked at the rearview mirror, and cursed. "He made a U-turn, and he's coming after us! At top speed!"

And suddenly, Reva knew who it was. Who it had to be.

"Josh," she screamed, "it's _Edmund!_ I know it's Edmund!" _I was a fool to think he'd let us drive away and go on with our lives!_

A white-faced Josh said tersely, "I know."

He accelerated...and reached into the glove compartment. Stunned, she saw him pull out a gun. Letting it drop into his lap, he gripped Colin, and told her, "Brace yourself!"

She'd barely had time to do it when he slammed on the brake.

"Josh - _no!_"

She heard the other driver come to a screeching stop as well.

"I can't lose him," Josh said quickly. "He's got a faster vehicle. But" - he took a steadying breath - "it may _not_ be Edmund. Could be some nutcase who just wants to complain that I was hogging the road. Or even wants to ask directions!

"You take this -" To her horror, he pressed the gun into her hand.

"_No_, Josh!"

"Take it!" Now he was opening the driver's side door. "I'm going back there. If anything happens to me, you take off, as fast as you can. If you're caught, use the gun. But above all, use your cell phone - _**warn Shayne!**_"

As she gave a despairing wail, he got out and strode back toward the menacing car.

She wanted to step outside as well. But for Colin's sake, she forced herself to stay in the truck, boost him over her lap, and slide into the driver's seat. To watch what was going to happen in the rearview mirror.

She saw the other driver get out of his car and walk up to meet Josh. At first, Josh was partially blocking her view of him.

But then she saw his face.

And fainted.

x

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Waking, she thought _Oh no. I just had another __**dream!**_

Maybe, if she didn't open her eyes, she could slip back into it...

It didn't seem she could.

But...something was wrong. She was lying flat on her back, but on something less comfortable than her bed._ On the __**ground?**_

_Was I really in a truck? With...with Josh?_

_In an accident?_

She opened her eyes. Blinked to clear her blurry vision.

And yes, an anxious-looking Josh was bending over her. Kneeling beside her, clasping her hands. And there was a blue sky overhead. So she really was on the ground.

"Reva?" he said cautiously. "Are you okay?"

"J-Josh? I th-think so. Were we in an accident? Oh my God - _Colin?_" She remembered he hadn't been in a car seat.

Did she also remember...no, that was crazy. She couldn't possibly have had a _gun_ in her lap.

"Colin's fine! Don't worry - it wasn't an accident. You just, uh, passed out. I lifted you out of the truck and laid you on the grass."

"Passed out?"

She never fainted for no reason!

And whether it was an accident or a fainting spell, there was something peculiar about the dream she'd had. Jeffrey...a _clean-shaven_ Jeffrey. Why didn't the Jeffrey in her dream have the mustache and beard he'd worn for so long? That was how she always pictured him.

"Think back, Reva," Josh prompted. "Do you remember who you saw before you fainted? Who you thought you saw?"

_**Before**__ I fainted?_ She was hopelessly confused.

And she didn't want to admit who she'd seen, not to Josh. But she had no choice.

"J-Jeffrey," she said in a small voice. "I thought I saw Jeffrey."

Mortified, she felt tears well up in her eyes.

_It must have been some stranger who just had the same build as Jeffrey, the same color hair. Josh will think I "see Jeffrey" everywhere. Maybe I am starting to see him everywhere!_

_Josh will take me home now. I've ruined everything, ruined everything for Colin..._

Josh gave her hands a reassuring squeeze. "Okay. Now I have something to tell you. It's going to come as a shock, but a good shock.

"You weren't imagining things. Reva, you _did_ see Jeffrey! He's alive! He's right here - he's come back to you."

"What?" _I must still be dreaming!_ "Jeffrey - alive? H-here? It can't be!"

"Come on, sit up. He's right here. We thought I should break it to you."

Still disbelieving, she let him help her struggle up to a sitting position.

And there, standing not six feet from her, was a nervous-looking Jeffrey, with Colin in his arms. Jeffrey _was_ clean-shaven - thinner than she remembered, and pale. But very much alive.

She gasped, screamed - then buried her face in her hands and began to sob.

She half-heard Josh saying, "Please believe me, Reva, _I didn't know!_ I never would have tried to steal you away before he got here. I was so shocked I almost fainted, too!"

And then it was Jeffrey on his knees beside her - he'd evidently handed the baby off to Josh (she could hear Colin protesting, loudly). "Reva?" He tried to put his arms around her.

But she shrank away from him.

He pulled back. "I'm sorry," he said humbly. "I know I can't expect -"

_"Damn you!"_ she screamed. Finally looking at him, reading utter confusion in his face. His _tear-stained_ face, she realized, even as she kept up her verbal assault. _"Why didn't you get here yesterday?"_

"I'm sorry," he repeated. "What was so special about yesterday?"

_Yesterday, I hadn't betrayed you_, she thought. She couldn't bring herself to say it aloud.

Couldn't say anything. All that came out was an undignified hiccup.

_Josh_ said, "Uh, Jeffrey, I think she's upset because today, she agreed to leave town with me. We were going to be, uh, _together_."

"Oh!" Jeffrey needed a minute to absorb that.

To his anguished wife, the minute seemed an eternity.

But then he said gently, "It's okay, Reva. I didn't realize...we're so close to Springfield, I assumed you were just headed for a restaurant in one of the other towns around here.

"I love you, but if you're with Josh now, I can accept it." Physically, he wasn't moving; yet with every word, he seemed to be putting more distance between them. "You thought I was dead. And I knew I couldn't expect you to live like a nun all this time."

She found her voice, and wailed, "But I _have_ been living like a nun!"

Josh said, "We were _going to_ be together, Jeffrey. But we haven't...done what you're thinking yet. In fact, before today, we hadn't seen each other for a year.

"And I knew perfectly well that if you were alive, she'd be with you. Now she will be with you. That's where she belongs."

"Is that true, Reva?" Jeffrey's voice shook slightly; he seemed to be fighting for calm, trying not to get his hopes up. But whether or not he knew it, the look in his eyes was imploring. "_Do_ you really want to be with me?"

She looked at Josh. _His_ eyes were suspiciously bright. But he nodded to her, and silently mouthed _Follow your heart_.

So she turned to Jeffrey, and the words came out in a rush. "Yes, yes, _yes!_"

He reached for her. But she said, "Wait. I have to show you something.

"I took my wedding ring off today. But it didn't go far. See?" She held up the chain she wore around her neck.

Its most conspicuous ornament was the peace-symbol pendant. But when she left home that morning, she'd been compulsively fingering two objects she'd dropped into a pocket of her dress. Before she got in the truck with Josh, she'd realized what she had to do: slip her necklace off and add those two things. She didn't think Josh had even seen her do it. But there they were.

Her wedding ring...and Jeffrey's, which he'd left for her to find on that old lantern.

And now she could say - knowing it was true - "I meant to wear both our rings on this chain, every day, for the rest of my life."

As her husband swept her into his arms, she suddenly remembered the last line of that Rodgers and Hammerstein song. _"Out of my dreams I'll go...into a dream with you."_


	4. Denouement

When Reva surfaced after a bout of frenzied kissing, she made herself ask, "Jeffrey - _how_ are you still alive? What happened?"

Josh, who'd been standing at a discreet distance, still holding Colin, cleared his throat. "And, uh, what's happening with Edmund?"

"Okay," Jeffrey told them, "I'll give you the Cliff Notes version first. Edmund is dead! I killed him. That's finally over."

Two voices exclaimed, "Thank God!" Josh had the presence of mind to add, "And thank _you_, Jeffrey."

"And, Reva, I want you to know I didn't fake my death deliberately! I never would have done a thing like that to you. When I went down with that plane, I was sure I was going to die. Later, there was a very good reason why I couldn't let you know I was alive.

"But before I get into more of it, I have to ask _you_ something. _What's happened to Jonathan?_ And Sarah, and Henry? Are _they_ still alive?"

Reva was stunned - by the questions, and by the real fear she saw in his eyes. "Still alive? Of course they are, all three of them, at least as of yesterday. But...why are you worried about Jonathan, asking _me_ about him? Did you know he was in Springfield?"

"Yes," Jeffrey said grimly. "He was in Springfield because I sent him here! I was keeping in touch with him, mostly to make sure you were all right. But six months ago -"

By the time he'd gotten that many words out, Reva and Josh were both yelling. Reva, the loudest. _"__**Jonathan?**__ Jonathan knew you were alive all this time, and never told me?"_

The frightened Colin began crying - and squirming, trying to get away from Josh.

Jeffrey, who'd been sitting on the grass with Reva, jumped to his feet and took the baby. Colin immediately settled down - though his eyes, darting back and forth among the adults, were as wide as saucers.

Jeffrey sighed. "There was a good reason why I couldn't tell you, remember? The same went for him."

Reva wasn't satisfied. On her feet now, she demanded, "But how did he know you were alive? Why did you choose _him_ to confide in?"

"I didn't!" Jeffrey gave a bemused shake of his head. "This is going to sound crazy, but believe me, it happened.

"After I survived the plane crash off the North Carolina coast, and got to shore, I spent a long time wandering in the woods. Injured. When I was on the verge of giving up - lying down and dying - I finally staggered into a clearing. Collapsed, and passed out - _in Jonathan's back yard!_ He and Sarah were living in a shack in those woods."

Reva could only stare at him, open-mouthed.

He went on, telling her about his terror when he learned, months ago, that Jonathan's cell phone number was "no longer in service."

She finally recovered her wits sufficiently to cut in, and explain what had happened with the phone. "Now I understand why he went on so about it! I'd never known anyone to care so much about a phone number. He claimed it had some sentimental importance - included a hotel room number that had meant something to him and Tammy. Ridiculous. I thought he was becoming mentally unstable!"

"Damn!" Jeffrey looked disgusted - with himself. "If I'd guessed it was something that simple, I could have gotten access to a computer - broken into a business after its closing time, if necessary - hacked into phone companies' data bases, and almost certainly found his new number. I was too quick to assume the worst, that he'd been murdered.

"But I'm still betting Edmund was behind what happened. He knew Jonathan had been helping me. If he didn't actually own stock in the phone companies, there may have been execs he could blackmail."

Josh had questions of his own. "We were told there was a dead body pinned in the wreckage of your plane, that couldn't be brought up. _Was_ there a body? And if so, who was it?"

Jeffrey grimaced. "Yes. Unfortunately, there was a body. A Florida p.i. who'd worked with me before - he joined me in Key West, came aboard at the last minute. And he really was pinned in there, unconscious, from the time we went down. I tried to rescue him, but I couldn't.

"I still haven't contacted his family. But I've learned that while he's officially listed as a missing person, the family's given up hope. Knowing the dangerous life he led, they're sure he was killed, somehow. So I won't be giving them devastating news when I tell them the whole story."

Josh said, "Um, about the 'whole story' - you gave us the Cliff Notes version of what happened, so you could get to asking about Jonathan. How about the rest of it? In particular, are you _sure_ Edmund's really dead this time - no more lookalikes?"

"Whole story, coming up," Jeffrey assured him. "But let's all sit down and be comfortable, okay? Pretend we're in the park.

"And, Reva, did you bring any of Colin's toys with you? To keep him occupied? He won't understand the things I'll be telling you - some of them pretty gross - but I'd still rather have his attention focused on something else!"

x

x

x

Five minutes later they were settled on the grass, Colin playing contentedly within reach of both his parents. Reva had brought a half-dozen of his favorite toys from the truck. Jeffrey, she'd learned, had moved both it and his car to the side of the road while she was passed out.

Now that she had time to think about it, she was amazed at how quickly Colin had accepted his father - clearly preferring him to Josh. He'd recognized him, after all this time! While keeping only one photo of Jeffrey on display in the house, she had been showing Colin more of them, every week or so. But in all the photos, Jeffrey had a mustache and beard. Colin had recognized his eyes!

There were a few tears in those eyes as Jeffrey watched his son at play. But then he pulled himself together, and began telling his story.

First, he explained what had happened after he survived the plane crash. How Edmund had learned he was alive, and teamed with Jonathan. And then, the threats Edmund had made: first, that he'd kidnap and raise Colin, Sarah, and Henry if he thought Reva had learned the truth, and later, that he'd kill them.

"My God," Reva whispered. By now she was holding her husband's hand. After a few moments' thought, she said, "Of course you couldn't tell me. With his wealth, he really could have had spies anywhere, bugs planted anywhere. If someone mentioned you in a public place like Company, and the wrong expression came over my face, just for an instant..." She shuddered. "I would have been a wreck. And if I never went out, that would have been suspicious in itself."

Jeffrey nodded. "Yes," he said grimly. "And there was another possibility I had to think of. What if the bastard did order an attack on the children, out of sheer sadism? If you'd known the truth, you'd blame yourself - imagine you'd given something away, even if you hadn't.

"From a distance, I couldn't protect the children. But by truly keeping you in the dark, I could at least deny him that way of torturing you."

He hesitated, then continued, "Actually, there was something else I could have done. He'd given us a tape recording of his first threat, a note containing the later one. So I finally had evidence he was alive! I could have surfaced, gone public with the whole thing. Then I could have come home...let law enforcement go after him...gotten police protection for everyone he'd threatened.

"But you know what they say about a wounded animal being the most dangerous. With his resources, Edmund would have been extremely dangerous. If I'd taken that action to thwart him, he might have struck out and killed more people, in hopes of including his intended targets. One possibility I thought of was that he might have his agents poison Springfield's water supply. And there were bound to be other possibilities I wouldn't think of.

"I'm sure he knew what he was doing when he presented me with that dilemma. He was _daring_ me to take the risk.

"And as he'd foreseen, I had to give in, and let him have the sick game he wanted. A long, dragged-out fight to the death between the two of us...with you thinking me already dead."

"But it must have been hell for you," she said softly. "And for poor Jonathan, especially after he came to Springfield and was seeing me almost every day."

"Yes. Maybe I shouldn't have asked him to do that."

"Selfishly, I'm glad you did. And I think he was very aware you might still be killed. He, more than anyone else, helped me stop obsessing unhealthily about my dead husband! He wouldn't have thought it mattered if he was sure you'd show up soon and snap me out of it." Then she smiled. "He'll be ecstatic when we show up _together!_"

x

x

x

Too late, she realized it might be insensitive to dwell on that in front of Josh.

Jeffrey must have realized it too, because he quickly changed the subject. "About Edmund's nastiness - Josh, you mentioned his having lookalikes, like our John Doe. Can anyone guess who Dinah really killed?"

When Josh didn't speak up, Reva did. "I think I can. She killed..._no one_."

Jeffrey nodded approvingly. "Right. I eventually learned what happened.

"Edmund had a henchman made his double with plastic surgery, and used the guy to establish alibis for him. To make it seem Edmund Winslow was in one place when he was really somewhere else, doing nefarious things. When he came to Springfield to kidnap Henry, he found some excuse to bring the double along.

"It was the real Edmund that Dinah clobbered with the baby stroller, and dumped in the river! But he wasn't dead. John Doe had seen the whole thing, from hiding. He rescued his boss - actually gave him artificial respiration.

"And Edmund repaid him by killing him. Changed clothes with the dead body, and put it in the river - caught in some brush along the bank, so it would surely be seen. He left that pouch of diamonds with the body too, because the dead person's having been carrying something that valuable would strengthen the illusion of its being the real Edmund.

"All for the purpose of framing you for his murder, Reva! I think he'd meant to kill his double and frame someone all along, even if he'd succeeded in kidnapping Henry. He'd wanted it to appear that he'd killed the baby, and disposed of the body - which would never be found - before someone killed _him. _Then he would have raised Henry, and no one would have been looking for them.

"By the time he actually killed John Doe, he'd given up on the idea of trying again to kidnap Henry during that visit to Springfield. He figured he'd have better chances down the road, with everyone thinking he was dead and there was no longer a threat.

"The person he hated most was Shayne, because he'd caused Lara's death. Shayne probably would have been his first choice for framing. But Dinah had come to believe she was Edmund's killer, and she was in love with Shayne! He knew she'd confess to protect Shayne...but not to protect _you_, Reva. And in fact, she only did confess out of concern for Mallet and Marina."

They all shook their heads. Josh muttered, "To waste the mind he had, on schemes like that..."

Jeffrey continued, "I'm guessing he bribed someone to make sure the body was cremated, and the ashes scattered in the lake, before the police could get fingerprints or DNA. There's no DNA in actual _ashes_, but cremated remains often include bits of bone. He knew we already had his DNA on file, of course - that was how he planned on framing Reva. He put fresh blood of his on the fake 'murder weapon' he planted in her car."

She'd started guiltily when she heard the word _cremated_. "Oh! He didn't need to bribe anyone. I'm afraid I played into his hands. I ordered the cremation - didn't you know that?"

As the mother of Edmund's nephew, she'd been accepted as the closest thing to a "relative" in Springfield.

Jeffrey looked puzzled. "I thought you denied it."

She shook her head. "No. I was accused of having ordered a quick cremation in hopes the police wouldn't discover he'd died of a head wound, rather than by accidental drowning. I only denied _that_, denied the _intent_. Damn it - everyone was so suspicious of everyone else back then, even you and I weren't really communicating.

"I did order the cremation, and scattering of the ashes. But just because I wanted to know we were rid of him, once and for all. That soon after the body was found, it hadn't occurred to me that it might not _be_ him."

Their eyes met. _Yes, he knows what I'm not saying...and why._

Technically, she hadn't lied to the police. She hadn't known for a fact that "Edmund" had been murdered, let alone how. But she'd suspected he'd been murdered - by Shayne. And she'd wanted to protect Shayne. She and Jeffrey had argued at the time. When he thought she'd ordered the hasty cremation, he'd pointed out - correctly - that she was risking legal trouble for herself, when her first obligation was not to an adult son, but to the _infant_ son who was totally dependent on his parents.

There was no need to get into that now, in front of Josh...

The look in Jeffrey's eyes told her there'd be no need to discuss it again, ever.

He gave a slow nod. "Understandable. And Edmund may have anticipated your doing that.

"But on the other hand...now that I think about it, he was so well-known and widely recognized that it might never have occurred to anyone to go beyond visual identification of his corpse. Maybe he was banking on _that_."

_He's trying to let me off the hook_, she realized. She felt a surge of affection for him.

And yet...Jeffrey had evidently been the first person to suspect that the dead man wasn't Edmund. Was it possible he'd only seen the potential for fakery because he himself was a lookalike, courtesy of plastic surgery, for the deceased _Richard_ Winslow?

Was it also possible Edmund had thought Jeffrey would be so sensitive on that subject that he wouldn't suggest it? Perhaps, wouldn't even allow himself to consciously suspect it?

x

x

x

Jeffrey went on to describe how he and Edmund had hunted each other for more than a year, with first one and then the other seeming to have the upper hand. They'd wound up in Nicaragua.

"There were other guys after him too, a mercenary commando team. I finally learned they were on the payroll of Phillip Spaulding."

Reva's eyes widened. So Phillip _hadn't_ forgotten about Edmund!

Jeffrey continued, "I would have been perfectly content if they'd been the ones to take him down. As it turned out, they weren't. But even though they didn't know about me - or rather, they thought Jeffrey O'Neill was dead - they helped me, indirectly, by getting him separated from his own goon squad.

"So there we were, just Edmund and me, stalking each other in the Nicaraguan jungle. There'd been previous occasions when both of us had missed clear shots because we'd had to assume the other guy was wearing a bulletproof vest, and aim for the head - much harder to hit than the torso. But in the sweltering heat of the jungle, neither of us could have endured wearing one of those things. So I think we both knew we were nearing the final showdown.

"When we met, I was in a tree and he was on the ground, but he was still better hidden by foliage. My shot at him missed. He shot me twice, in the left side and left leg - it's okay, Reva, this was three months ago! - and the impact knocked me out of the tree. I came down on my back, hard. Nowhere near my gun.

"I couldn't get up, couldn't even _sit_ up. But I could bend my right leg. And before he reached me, I was able to palm the dagger I'd had strapped to that leg.

"Then he was standing over me, gun in hand. All he had to do was put a bullet in my head or my heart, and I was a goner. But he couldn't resist having some sadistic fun. So he bent over me and started mocking me - saying I was a fool. I'd thrown my life away for nothing, because you, Reva, Jonathan, Shayne, and the three children were already dead! He'd had his men kill all of you!"

Reva almost choked. "Oh God, no!" She looked at Josh, and saw that he was as white as a sheet.

"I had no way of knowing whether it was true," Jeffrey went on. "But I wasn't going to let him play me. So I sneered right back at him, and laughed at him. Told him, 'You're a lousy liar. I don't believe a word of it!'

"I wanted to goad him into trying to strangle me with his bare hands. I don't know whether he eventually would have. But I made him so angry that he got down on one knee - to spit in my face, and be sure to connect.

"He connected, all right. But he'd never spotted my dagger. And I drove it right up his nose, into his brain.

"The sounds of that - the sounds he made, dying - were so bad that I threw up. Damn near choked on my vomit."

Reva finally broke the shocked silence that followed by saying, "I can see why you wanted Colin to be busy with his toys..."

Josh said hoarsely, "H-how did you survive?"

Jeffrey took a deep breath. "I didn't expect to. With Edmund's body on top of me, I couldn't even move. But we were found by people from a nearby village - Central American Indians. They'd heard the gunshots, and after waiting a while to be on the safe side, they came out to investigate. They accepted that I was the good guy, and did all they could to help me. But I was stuck in the jungle for months.

"This is important. No one could be deader than Edmund was. But even so...

"I vowed not to let myself lose consciousness till he was buried, and I didn't. Never let him out of my sight. The man I'd skewered with that dagger was definitely the same one I saw in full rigor, _and_ saw buried in an unmarked grave." There was a wicked glint in his eye as he concluded, "On my suggestion, the villagers filled the grave with garbage."

They sat in silence for a few minutes, watching the innocent toddler at his play.

Then Reva said, "And you...you d-didn't know whether Colin and I, and the others, were alive or dead? For how long?"

"For months," Jeffrey replied grimly. "Months of hell. But when I got out of the jungle, I at least made sure of you and Shayne. Remember a phone call where the caller never said anything, but just hung on while you said 'Hello? Is anyone on the line?' a few times?"

"Oh, God! That was you?"

"Yes. I did the same thing with Shayne."

"Why didn't you -?" She broke off, seeing the explanation for herself.

He answered anyway. "You believed I was dead. If I started talking to you, you would have thought either that it was a vicious trick of Edmund's - trying to gaslight you - or that you really were losing your mind. Ditto with Shayne, except that he would have been sure it was the 'vicious trick of Edmund's.' I didn't think either of you would stay on the line long enough to let me tell you things that would prove who I was."

After another somber silence, he said, "And of course, I couldn't rush to the media and say, 'I'm Jeffrey O'Neill, I'm alive, and I killed Edmund Winslow'! It was a kill-or-be-killed situation, had been for more than a year, but proving that might not have been easy. And in any case, I didn't want to give my family that sort of shock.

"So I decided to head back to Springfield - meaning to look for Jonathan before I did anything else. If I found him alive, I was going to ask him to break the news about me, gently, to you, Reva. But when I recognized you and Josh in that truck, headed the other way, I...I guess I just lost it."

Laying her head on his shoulder, Reva murmured, "I'm glad you did."

x

x

x

An hour later, they'd shared a picnic lunch and were _all_ preparing to head back to Springfield - though Josh only intended to stay long enough to let everyone see he wasn't a sore loser. As Reva and Jeffrey were installing Colin's car seat - which she'd had in the back of the truck - in his father's rented car, Jeffrey said regretfully, "I'm afraid I spent most of the money that was supposed to guarantee his college education."

"That should be the least of our concerns," she told him. "You greatly improved the odds that he, and two other children, will live to reach college!"

"There is that."

She'd realized after he left Springfield that he'd all but cleaned out his bank accounts, and cashed in most of his investments. Scrupulously taking only funds that were indisputably his - he hadn't touched anything that had initially been hers, even though he'd had access. She'd wished he _had_ taken those funds as well.

"I was wondering, though," she asked now, "what did you do with the money? Not 'what did you spend it on' - I know that. Travel, renting cars and planes, paying for leads, hiring helpers. But you couldn't have been carrying it around in cash."

"No," he admitted. "I had a half-dozen false identities that I'd set up years ago, and never bothered to deactivate. They all had bank accounts with a few dollars in them, and still-valid ATM cards. I knew I'd want to use different aliases in my travels, to elude Edmund. So I transferred the funds into those accounts, online.

"Luckily, when the plane went down, I had the documentation for all the fake identities on my person, in a waterproof packet. Along with my real passport, and a photo of you and Colin! I formed the habit, years ago, of carrying important papers that way when I travel.

"I hadn't envisioned Jeffrey O'Neill's being 'dead' unless I was _really_ dead. But I would have put the money in the aliases' accounts even if I wasn't thinking of Edmund's possibly getting at it. I didn't want you to be a nervous wreck, checking accounts you knew about every day, to look for activity that would prove I was still alive. Better to call you now and then - not on any agreed-to schedule - but otherwise, make a clean break."

She shuddered. "Yes, I can see that."

_But I was a nervous wreck, from the start, anyway_.

After they'd gotten Colin strapped in, Jeffrey said tentatively, "There's someone else I'll have to see in Springfield...very soon."

She got the point at once. "Olivia, right? So she can call Ava and tell her, and then put you on the phone."

"Right." His smile was weary, but so full of love that she couldn't imagine how she'd ever thought she could live without him.

"You should do that today," she said decisively. "I can wait an extra hour or two to have you all to myself. But" - she brushed suggestively against his crotch - "not much longer!"

Now he was grinning like a schoolboy. "You know what? I was hoping against hope that all would be well with Jonathan. With _everyone_. And on the chance it would, I brought you, um, a gag gift."

He rummaged in the car, produced the gag gift.

And Reva's jaw dropped.

A small box, wrapped in silver foil and decorated with red, white, and blue ribbons...

She stared at the box for a full minute.

Then she looked at him and said, "Well, it's about time. I really needed these nails!"

x

x

x

_**One year later.**_

Reva looked at herself in the mirror.

Her husband came up behind her, studied her reflection.

Pouting, he said, "I'm concerned about the way you look today."

Reva, resplendent in vivid blue, knew a punchline was coming. She asked coyly, "What's the problem, Mr. District Attorney?"

"You're too stunning. I'm afraid my wife is going to outshine the brides."

She gave a rich, throaty laugh. "At least we won't have to worry about you outshining any grooms!"

x

x

x

A half-hour later, they were part of the buzzing crowd that filled the church. _Josh's _church, Reva reminded herself. She could still hardly believe how their lives had fallen into place.

When Shayne and Marina had decided to wed, Shayne - bless him - had pointed out that Josh was still technically a minister, and coaxed him into performing the ceremony.

That had set Josh to thinking, reevaluating his life. When he married Frank and Blake a few months later, he was a _minister - _no "technically" about it.

Now he was a pastor with a growing congregation. In Springfield! There was still no woman in his life, and Reva had teased him about it, saying, "You're not a Catholic priest, you know!"

Today, she was thankful he wasn't. The Catholic Church - as was its right - still opposed same-sex marriage. But the state had just legalized it. And their friend Natalia had concluded that her conscience would permit her to go against the faith in which she'd been raised, to marry her partner Olivia.

Reva suspected she wouldn't have been able to do it if they'd had to be married by a stranger. Even if they'd been willing to settle for a civil ceremony, Doris Wolfe was no longer mayor.

Of course there'd been chuckles. _Not the first same-sex marriage in the state, but certainly the first in which the minister's an ex-husband of one of the brides!_ But all the joking had been good-natured.

Now the organist began playing, and to the _oohs_ and _aahs_ of the assembled guests, the wedding party paced up the aisle.

First, Olivia's adorable little girl, Emma, led Natalia's toddler daughter Francesca by the hand. Both were clad in pink; their respective fathers, Phillip Spaulding and Frank Cooper, wore the brightest smiles in the church.

Then came the two young-adult attendants, walking side by side: Natalia's son Rafe, and Ava, the beautiful daughter Olivia shared with Jeffrey. Reva felt honored that Ava and the brides had let her help them select Ava's lovely light blue gown.

And finally, Olivia and Natalia, hand in hand, smiling through tears of joy. They wore simple, identical gowns of ivory silk; but that was irrelevant. If they'd worn burlap, _no one_ could have outshone them on this day.

Josh performed a tasteful, dignified ceremony, in which the two women exchanged heartfelt vows that they themselves had written. By the time it was over, there wasn't a dry eye in the church.

x

x

x

Four hours later, the reception - in the church hall - was in full swing. Reva, floating across the dance floor in her husband's arms, thought she couldn't possibly be any happier.

Until Jeffrey whispered, "Hey. I'm seeing something that might turn out to be...beyond our wildest dreams."

"What?"

"Take a look. Over by the piano. Look who's dancing together!"

She looked. _"Ohhh..."_

The young couple weren't just dancing. They were gazing into each other's eyes as if they were truly seeing each other for the first time, and they'd just received a wondrous revelation.

Jeffrey's Ava...and her Jonathan.

x

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The End

x

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_**Author's Afterword:**_ I was a fan who could have accepted Reva's winding up with either Josh or Jeffrey, if the writing of the show's final months supported it. The writers hadn't been given enough notice of the cancellation to have Reva and Jeffrey break up, plausibly, without alienating fans of Jeffrey. But they could have had him really die - heroically, taking Edmund with him - and then had Reva reunite with Josh "One Year Later."

Instead, they chose to show viewers Reva's agonizing grief over Jeffrey's "death," then let us know he was still alive. By then I'm sure many fans were, like me, waiting with bated breath to see her shock - followed by ecstasy - when all was revealed, Edmund apprehended or killed, and her husband came back to her.

The outcome we saw was, in my opinion, unfair to Jeffrey, Reva, and Josh. If we imagine them - and innocent baby Colin - as real people, they were all being set up for undeserved anguish, months or years down the road.

When Reva and Jeffrey were last together, they'd been portrayed as deeply in love. And nothing had happened before the finale that could have changed that. With Jeffrey alive, a "happy ending" could only be one that reunited them.

So I wrote my own, in which I was constrained by two decisions I made at the outset: that I wouldn't contradict anything we'd actually seen (except the words "The End"), and that Reva and Jeffrey would be reunited before she'd made matters worse by having sex with Josh.

I can't guarantee that in the six pieces I ultimately wrote, there are no canon errors. But I am sure there are no typos!

x

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**_Postscript added Sept. 2, 2012:_** I've learned there was a plan to show Jeffrey arriving back in Springfield - probably, at the lighthouse itself - just as the oblivious Josh and Reva were driving away. That scene was taped, but later cut. I think it would have left viewers with a very different impression: that Jeffrey would undoubtedly try to follow and catch up with them, and every viewer could imagine the outcome he or she chose.


End file.
